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JohnnyAudio
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Two audiophiles walk into a bar…and start impressing the chicks with acronyms.
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Two audiophiles walk into a bar... (finish the joke)
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JohnnyAudio
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An audiophile walks into a bar… no one has ever seen him before.
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JohnnyAudio
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Two Audiophiles walk into a bar..... at 112 BPM.
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JohnnyAudio
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Two Audiophiles walk into a bar..... and order vinyl slushies. " These are good!" says one guy. The other says... "yeah, they're virgin."
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JohnnyAudio
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Two Audiophiles walk into a bar....One says..."Do you realize this is a LoFi bar?" The other says..." Sounds pretty good to me, I ate 6 gummies, 70 minutes ago"
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JohnnyAudio
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Two Audiophiles walk into a bar..... "Did you know, 9 out of 10 audiophiles do not understand ohm's law". The second guy replies... "Ohm my God, I had no idea."
The first fellow says... "exactly."
The first fellow says... "exactly."
Two audiophiles walk into a bar and up to the female bartender.
The first audiophile says "I'd like a spinoroma please".
The bartender says "I get off at 10".
The audiophile says "thanks but I need to listen to my new speakers tonight".
The first audiophile says "I'd like a spinoroma please".
The bartender says "I get off at 10".
The audiophile says "thanks but I need to listen to my new speakers tonight".
Two audiophiles walk into a bar and order some cocktails.
They get into a conversation with the bartender about their audiophile hobby, "tweaks", and how "everything matters".
The bartender asks if "tweaks" only apply to the sense of hearing, or whether the principle might apply to taste, too?
The audiophiles think about it, and agree that "tweaks" could also alter the flavor of cocktails.
For their next drink, the bartender "tweaks" it by putting a half-drop of salt water in the drink. They agree it's a huge, obvious improvement.
For the second tweak, the bartender simply taps each ice cube on the bar twice before putting them in the shaker. This time the improvement is even more obvious and profound. Flavor veils are lifted. They gulp down the cocktails.
Finally, the bartender's last "tweak": He simply winks at the whiskey once as he pours it.
The audiophiles eagerly taste their next drink, and spit it out in disgust - "That least tweak ruined it".
They get into a conversation with the bartender about their audiophile hobby, "tweaks", and how "everything matters".
The bartender asks if "tweaks" only apply to the sense of hearing, or whether the principle might apply to taste, too?
The audiophiles think about it, and agree that "tweaks" could also alter the flavor of cocktails.
For their next drink, the bartender "tweaks" it by putting a half-drop of salt water in the drink. They agree it's a huge, obvious improvement.
For the second tweak, the bartender simply taps each ice cube on the bar twice before putting them in the shaker. This time the improvement is even more obvious and profound. Flavor veils are lifted. They gulp down the cocktails.
Finally, the bartender's last "tweak": He simply winks at the whiskey once as he pours it.
The audiophiles eagerly taste their next drink, and spit it out in disgust - "That least tweak ruined it".
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Two audiophiles walk into a bar.
The first says "Give me a shot of whisky, but make sure its 24 years old. None of that 16 year crap. I can taste the difference." The bar tender pulls out a 44.2ml shot glass and fills it up to the line.
The second says "Give me a shot of whisky too, and mine also needs to be 24 years old. But I want it in a 192ml glass!" The bartender gives him a strange look and says "You're only getting 20ml of liquid in the glass." The second audiophile smirks and says "Yeah, but I can taste the difference."
For us backwards Americans, 44.2ml = 1.4oz and 192ml is 0.4 pints.
The first says "Give me a shot of whisky, but make sure its 24 years old. None of that 16 year crap. I can taste the difference." The bar tender pulls out a 44.2ml shot glass and fills it up to the line.
The second says "Give me a shot of whisky too, and mine also needs to be 24 years old. But I want it in a 192ml glass!" The bartender gives him a strange look and says "You're only getting 20ml of liquid in the glass." The second audiophile smirks and says "Yeah, but I can taste the difference."
For us backwards Americans, 44.2ml = 1.4oz and 192ml is 0.4 pints.
Two audiophiles walk into a bar, get a bit drunk, and start boasting about how much they've spent on their systems.
"I once paid more for a single RCA cable than I was paying for a month's rent."
"I once paid more for a single speaker wire than my car was worth at the time!"
"That's nothing, I mortgaged my my house, took the money to the casino, put it all on black, won, and then spent it on a turntable!"
A third guy down the bar pipes up after hearing this.
"I used to be into the audiophile scene myself. I traded a Ferrari in for an ultra-rare stylus, once... but then I finally came to my senses and realized that all this stuff sounds basically the same. Now I have a nice compact digital system and some nice speakers. I'm much happier and I have more money than I know what to do with."
The audiophiles roar with laughter - "you poor, deluded fool!"
"I once paid more for a single RCA cable than I was paying for a month's rent."
"I once paid more for a single speaker wire than my car was worth at the time!"
"That's nothing, I mortgaged my my house, took the money to the casino, put it all on black, won, and then spent it on a turntable!"
A third guy down the bar pipes up after hearing this.
"I used to be into the audiophile scene myself. I traded a Ferrari in for an ultra-rare stylus, once... but then I finally came to my senses and realized that all this stuff sounds basically the same. Now I have a nice compact digital system and some nice speakers. I'm much happier and I have more money than I know what to do with."
The audiophiles roar with laughter - "you poor, deluded fool!"
two audiophiles walk into a bar….
the navigator took them there. In truth they were looking for another place but due to a strange twist of fate they end up elsewhere...they decide to go in anyway because they can't get to the bottom of it. the place is called Saloon 2, but for friends, “Amirm’s”!!
the first turns to the second: listen, try putting “Golden Ears” back in the navigator!! but come on, let's try something new, I can't stand that place anymore!! oh well, we're here now, let's order something, it's late.
The maitre approaches, with the name on the yellow tag pinned to his chest: AdamG. Gentlemen, he exclaims, welcome, new to these parts? yes, the two reply, we are very well used to it, specifies one of the customers, we know everything about the best foods!!!
What do you recommend this evening? I'll leave you the list, you can start to get an idea there, I'll come back in a moment.
The two open the card and immediately realize that there is something different. The dishes are described in a very dry, almost objective way. Nothing warm, soft enveloping.
AdamG approaches, asking them if they were ready. One of the two replies: I bet the t-bone I eat at Golden Ears, dry aged for 14 weeks and treated with ginger beer is better than yours!! Noticing the scene from the counter, Amirm the owner approaches: AdamG, whispers in a low voice: here are two more....
Amirm takes the situation into his own hands, and, firmly, replies: try it!! I bet that if I bring you my steak, blindfolded, you won't notice the difference... The two order the meal and two different bottles of beer, highly recommended: one REW and one PEQ.
accept the challenge: the first says to the second: be careful, it will definitely be a trap, even my wife told me that that tbone from the "Golden Ears ” it was the best, he understood it from the aroma….
after some time one of the cooks, a certain Doodsky, comes out of the kitchen: he brings the dish to the table. Meanwhile, in the corner of the room the guitarist begins to play. The group is made up of several elements, each with the group's pink t-shirt, the ASR; the members are Boris, the nice singer, Kemmler, Sal1950, mhardy, SIY and Purite.
from the kitchen Solderdude, MattHooper, Radix and restorer -John, scrupulous chefs, try to understand what the two think of the food cooked with such expertise.
A good half hour passes and Amirm and AdamG approach the table: so? they ask them….
the two almost intimidated respond; you were right, your advice was excellent, in fact, we will see each other more often!!!
the audiophile member ask the manager: but how was it possible to eat so well while spending the right amount, but how do you do it??
we measure everything, no magic, nothing is left to chance, replies AdamG.
Yes!! it's exactly like that, continues Amirm, you see, it's the raw material that counts, not prejudices, the right cooking times, we are able with just a few filters to objectively improve everything... well….not exactly everything though...!!
what for example?? asks one of the two!! Well, there are some very "poor" things that are unusable....!
So they will cost little? continue anyway... no, in fact our top 20 best dishes are often very cheap... but far exceed the threshold of goodness of taste!!!
the two don't understand immediately, they thank them and go to the cash register where there is a certain Blumlein,
they pay and hurry to the exit. the other boy at the counter BDWoody beckons to them, calls them: he gives them two business cards, pink, in the shape of a panther: original!!! exclaims one of the two. the boy at the bar asks for their name, writes it on the ticket in pen, new member. Hey, exclaims the buddy, is this a club? no, he replies, no dogmas here, only truth, and clarity!!! but if you have understood how we work you will continue to come back,….the two say goodbye, thank you and leave….before leaving they turn to look at that place: mmmhh ASR, Panther, ASR, Saloon…..then one says to the other: but….so could it be that we have been going to the wrong places for a long time??
oops, a notification arrived, sorry, I was carried away by the finally pleasant music (thanks for the advice!!!!) in the background, and I fear I fell asleep...
someone mentioned my post!!! it's time to answer,….who knows, maybe it's a new member asking for clarification on cables, on steaks, or on some 20,000 euro snakes oil that feels great….:!!! or perhaps, very likely, some of the "elderly" member, will have scolded me for a comment.... I can already hear Keith, Jimbo or perhaps Voodooless writing to me: measurements?? can you try it??
PS sorry if I didn't include everyone, but we would need a 50 page story, see you next thread of this type!!!!
anyway, thanks to all ASR member for their patience, advice and good time spent discussing audio!!
the navigator took them there. In truth they were looking for another place but due to a strange twist of fate they end up elsewhere...they decide to go in anyway because they can't get to the bottom of it. the place is called Saloon 2, but for friends, “Amirm’s”!!
the first turns to the second: listen, try putting “Golden Ears” back in the navigator!! but come on, let's try something new, I can't stand that place anymore!! oh well, we're here now, let's order something, it's late.
The maitre approaches, with the name on the yellow tag pinned to his chest: AdamG. Gentlemen, he exclaims, welcome, new to these parts? yes, the two reply, we are very well used to it, specifies one of the customers, we know everything about the best foods!!!
What do you recommend this evening? I'll leave you the list, you can start to get an idea there, I'll come back in a moment.
The two open the card and immediately realize that there is something different. The dishes are described in a very dry, almost objective way. Nothing warm, soft enveloping.
AdamG approaches, asking them if they were ready. One of the two replies: I bet the t-bone I eat at Golden Ears, dry aged for 14 weeks and treated with ginger beer is better than yours!! Noticing the scene from the counter, Amirm the owner approaches: AdamG, whispers in a low voice: here are two more....
Amirm takes the situation into his own hands, and, firmly, replies: try it!! I bet that if I bring you my steak, blindfolded, you won't notice the difference... The two order the meal and two different bottles of beer, highly recommended: one REW and one PEQ.
accept the challenge: the first says to the second: be careful, it will definitely be a trap, even my wife told me that that tbone from the "Golden Ears ” it was the best, he understood it from the aroma….
after some time one of the cooks, a certain Doodsky, comes out of the kitchen: he brings the dish to the table. Meanwhile, in the corner of the room the guitarist begins to play. The group is made up of several elements, each with the group's pink t-shirt, the ASR; the members are Boris, the nice singer, Kemmler, Sal1950, mhardy, SIY and Purite.
from the kitchen Solderdude, MattHooper, Radix and restorer -John, scrupulous chefs, try to understand what the two think of the food cooked with such expertise.
A good half hour passes and Amirm and AdamG approach the table: so? they ask them….
the two almost intimidated respond; you were right, your advice was excellent, in fact, we will see each other more often!!!
the audiophile member ask the manager: but how was it possible to eat so well while spending the right amount, but how do you do it??
we measure everything, no magic, nothing is left to chance, replies AdamG.
Yes!! it's exactly like that, continues Amirm, you see, it's the raw material that counts, not prejudices, the right cooking times, we are able with just a few filters to objectively improve everything... well….not exactly everything though...!!
what for example?? asks one of the two!! Well, there are some very "poor" things that are unusable....!
So they will cost little? continue anyway... no, in fact our top 20 best dishes are often very cheap... but far exceed the threshold of goodness of taste!!!
the two don't understand immediately, they thank them and go to the cash register where there is a certain Blumlein,
they pay and hurry to the exit. the other boy at the counter BDWoody beckons to them, calls them: he gives them two business cards, pink, in the shape of a panther: original!!! exclaims one of the two. the boy at the bar asks for their name, writes it on the ticket in pen, new member. Hey, exclaims the buddy, is this a club? no, he replies, no dogmas here, only truth, and clarity!!! but if you have understood how we work you will continue to come back,….the two say goodbye, thank you and leave….before leaving they turn to look at that place: mmmhh ASR, Panther, ASR, Saloon…..then one says to the other: but….so could it be that we have been going to the wrong places for a long time??
oops, a notification arrived, sorry, I was carried away by the finally pleasant music (thanks for the advice!!!!) in the background, and I fear I fell asleep...
someone mentioned my post!!! it's time to answer,….who knows, maybe it's a new member asking for clarification on cables, on steaks, or on some 20,000 euro snakes oil that feels great….:!!! or perhaps, very likely, some of the "elderly" member, will have scolded me for a comment.... I can already hear Keith, Jimbo or perhaps Voodooless writing to me: measurements?? can you try it??
PS sorry if I didn't include everyone, but we would need a 50 page story, see you next thread of this type!!!!
anyway, thanks to all ASR member for their patience, advice and good time spent discussing audio!!
Two audiophiles walk into a bar, but subjectively it was at least three or four.
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JohnnyAudio
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- Joined
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- Likes
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- #75
You're amazing!two audiophiles walk into a bar….
the navigator took them there. In truth they were looking for another place but due to a strange twist of fate they end up elsewhere...they decide to go in anyway because they can't get to the bottom of it. the place is called Saloon 2, but for friends, “Amirm’s”!!
the first turns to the second: listen, try putting “Golden Ears” back in the navigator!! but come on, let's try something new, I can't stand that place anymore!! oh well, we're here now, let's order something, it's late.
The maitre approaches, with the name on the yellow tag pinned to his chest: AdamG. Gentlemen, he exclaims, welcome, new to these parts? yes, the two reply, we are very well used to it, specifies one of the customers, we know everything about the best foods!!!
What do you recommend this evening? I'll leave you the list, you can start to get an idea there, I'll come back in a moment.
The two open the card and immediately realize that there is something different. The dishes are described in a very dry, almost objective way. Nothing warm, soft enveloping.
AdamG approaches, asking them if they were ready. One of the two replies: I bet the t-bone I eat at Golden Ears, dry aged for 14 weeks and treated with ginger beer is better than yours!! Noticing the scene from the counter, Amirm the owner approaches: AdamG, whispers in a low voice: here are two more....
Amirm takes the situation into his own hands, and, firmly, replies: try it!! I bet that if I bring you my steak, blindfolded, you won't notice the difference... The two order the meal and two different bottles of beer, highly recommended: one REW and one PEQ.
accept the challenge: the first says to the second: be careful, it will definitely be a trap, even my wife told me that that tbone from the "Golden Ears ” it was the best, he understood it from the aroma….
after some time one of the cooks, a certain Doodsky, comes out of the kitchen: he brings the dish to the table. Meanwhile, in the corner of the room the guitarist begins to play. The group is made up of several elements, each with the group's pink t-shirt, the ASR; the members are Boris, the nice singer, Kemmler, Sal1950, mhardy, SIY and Purite.
from the kitchen Solderdude, MattHooper, Radix and restorer -John, scrupulous chefs, try to understand what the two think of the food cooked with such expertise.
A good half hour passes and Amirm and AdamG approach the table: so? they ask them….
the two almost intimidated respond; you were right, your advice was excellent, in fact, we will see each other more often!!!
the audiophile member ask the manager: but how was it possible to eat so well while spending the right amount, but how do you do it??
we measure everything, no magic, nothing is left to chance, replies AdamG.
Yes!! it's exactly like that, continues Amirm, you see, it's the raw material that counts, not prejudices, the right cooking times, we are able with just a few filters to objectively improve everything... well….not exactly everything though...!!
what for example?? asks one of the two!! Well, there are some very "poor" things that are unusable....!
So they will cost little? continue anyway... no, in fact our top 20 best dishes are often very cheap... but far exceed the threshold of goodness of taste!!!
the two don't understand immediately, they thank them and go to the cash register where there is a certain Blumlein,
they pay and hurry to the exit. the other boy at the counter BDWoody beckons to them, calls them: he gives them two business cards, pink, in the shape of a panther: original!!! exclaims one of the two. the boy at the bar asks for their name, writes it on the ticket in pen, new member. Hey, exclaims the buddy, is this a club? no, he replies, no dogmas here, only truth, and clarity!!! but if you have understood how we work you will continue to come back,….the two say goodbye, thank you and leave….before leaving they turn to look at that place: mmmhh ASR, Panther, ASR, Saloon…..then one says to the other: but….so could it be that we have been going to the wrong places for a long time??
oops, a notification arrived, sorry, I was carried away by the finally pleasant music (thanks for the advice!!!!) in the background, and I fear I fell asleep...
someone mentioned my post!!! it's time to answer,….who knows, maybe it's a new member asking for clarification on cables, on steaks, or on some 20,000 euro snakes oil that feels great….:!!! or perhaps, very likely, some of the "elderly" member, will have scolded me for a comment.... I can already hear Keith, Jimbo or perhaps Voodooless writing to me: measurements?? can you try it??
PS sorry if I didn't include everyone, but we would need a 50 page story, see you next thread of this type!!!!
anyway, thanks to all ASR member for their patience, advice and good time spent discussing audio!!
You know everyone!
well...reading and writing...."get to know" other users!!
anyway everyone more or less “scolded”me at least once!!!
An objective audiophile walks into a bar with a box. He meets his subjective audiophile friend. His subjective friend asks "what's in the box". The objective friend says "Speakers. If you can tell me how many are in the box, I will give you both of them". The subjective friend guesses three or four or five based on the size of the box.
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