A Call For Humor!

[Blumlein 88]

A bird was flying south for the winter in the freezing cold.
It wasn’t long before it had to land.
While laying there on the ground a cow crapped on the bird.
The bird got completely covered, started to panic then realized it was warming up.
So the bird settled in until it was all warmed up then tried to get out of the crap.
But it was a struggle and the bird was making a lot of noise.
A passing cat heard the noise, dug the bird out of the crap then ate the bird.

And the moral of the story is:
Not everybody that craps on you is your enemy.
Not everybody that gets you out of crap is your friend.
And if you are in really deep crap, you should keep your mouth shut.

A friend who was in the Marines recounted a more colorful version of this told to him by a Sergeant while he was in boot camp on Paris Island.

 

[Sir Sanders Zingmore]

A termite walks into a pub and asks “is the bartender here?”

 

[Waxx]

 

[Boris Badinov]

In the spirit of Halloween:

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[Boris Badinov]

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[Boris Badinov]

 

[Boris Badinov]

 

[Boris Badinov]

 

[Martin]

View attachment 236554​

Hooters is going to suck!

 

[PierreV]

 

[sergeauckland]

Hopefully it'll take them the 65 minutes it takes any other orchestra to play it...

S.

 

[mhardy6647]

Hopefully it'll take them the 65 minutes it takes any other orchestra to play it...

S.

I thought it was ca. 74 minutes (the length of the redbook CD)?

Dec. 16, 1770: Beethoven's Birth in Bonn Leads to Longer CDs

1770: Ludwig van Beethoven is born to a family of musicians in Bonn, Germany. His Ninth Symphony will play a role in determining the length of the music CD. Exactly how big a role is a matter of debate. Had it not been for his untimely death in 1827, the immortal Ludwig van would today […]

www.wired.com

 

[sergeauckland]

I thought it was ca. 74 minutes (the length of the redbook CD)?

Dec. 16, 1770: Beethoven's Birth in Bonn Leads to Longer CDs

1770: Ludwig van Beethoven is born to a family of musicians in Bonn, Germany. His Ninth Symphony will play a role in determining the length of the music CD. Exactly how big a role is a matter of debate. Had it not been for his untimely death in 1827, the immortal Ludwig van would today […]

www.wired.com

Or Klemperer's 3 days...
S.

 

[mhardy6647]

Or Klemperer's 3 days...
S.

Otto or (his little boy) Werner?

 

[rgpit]

Hopefully it'll take them the 65 minutes it takes any other orchestra to play it...

S.

That's because they're playing it at 45 rpm and not the standard 33 1/3.

 

[Spkrdctr]

Why are you gonna go and get techie on us, when I am attempting some genuine hyperbolic hyperbole???
Jeeeez!

I like that sentence. That is as good as my standby, "Let me get my broad brush out" type of posting! LOL Your line sounds so much more technical though. Hyperbolic hyperbole for the win.

 

[Somafunk]

That's because they're playing it at 45 rpm and not the standard 33 1/3.

The John Peel defence, if you understand then award yourself a gold star

 

[Martin Takamine]

A friend who was in the Marines recounted a more colorful version of this told to him by a Sergeant while he was in boot camp on Paris Island.

I toned it down for this crowd.
I know it's an old joke just like the one about a dog that counts ducks.

 

[Martin Takamine]

South Park - Continuing Source of Inspiration

 

[Bleib]