I know you are being facetious, and I understand what you are getting at, but in practice this would not happen because one of the appeals, perhaps the greatest appeal of records/tape was its visual-haptic dimension, apart from any aural or hearing sensation. Also, the ritual. The ritual was a very important thing.
Laserdisc is essentially a black box, like a CD or DVD player. They were large, bulky, and visually undistinguished. No ritual at all.
Open reel is even 'cooler' than records in the 'look at me' department, but not nearly as friendly as record playing, a hobby that can be afforded by most people to one degree or another should they want to do it. Also, turntables are relatively easy to maintain, lasting a long time. Open reel decks have always been money funnels requiring mucho maintenance. Open reel tape is through the roof price-wise. Unlike old records, old tape is more miss than hit.
Ritual-wise, nothing beats open reel, though. The joy of buying leaderless tape and then adding your own white leader; splicing/editing with your Gibson Girl (mostly if you used the twice as expensive half-track format); baking reels in your oven when you discovered your tape sticking/squealing; finding out that your machine had been eating your tape when you walked into the kitchen for a sandwich, then having to manually pull off the twisted sections; demagnetizing (bulk and heads); cleaning heads with your Maxell or Teac head cleaning kit; realizing you loaded the tape on backwards or twisted it when you threaded the reel... I mean, what can compare to that?
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