A New Cable Company - First Run Copper

[Gregss]

Hello All,

Would suggest you get a couple of sets supposedly blessed by religious leaders. The Pope, Dali Lama, Trump and whoever else you can come up with. Should get the big dollars from some of those who wouldn't otherwise get suckered.

 

[mansr]

Would suggest you get a couple of sets supposedly blessed by religious leaders. The Pope, Dali Lama, Trump and whoever else you can come up with. Should get the big dollars from some of those who wouldn't otherwise get suckered.

That already exists, only the leaders are called Paul McClown, Ted Denney, etc.

 

[mhardy6647]

So the wire will cost us $1.20 per pair of 3' cables. Jacket 30¢, binding posts 50¢. Labor will be free, that's your investment cost. If restocking fee of 10% is 10x the cost of the cable , then the cable will retail at 100x cost, so we're talking about $200 per 3' pair.

Careful -- re-read the Iconoclast thread. If you don't charge enough for the cable, no one will take you seriously. I think might need to consider roughly an order of magnitude increase in price.

 

[scott wurcer]

Hello All,

Would suggest you get a couple of sets supposedly blessed by religious leaders. The Pope, Dali Lama, Trump and whoever else you can come up with. Should get the big dollars from some of those who wouldn't otherwise get suckered.

Better yet send them up in SpaceX and back.

 

[RayDunzl]

electrons dislike fighting for space on a crowded and increasingly smaller wire

And on the other side of the restriction (or, say, in the opposite direction) would be what, a decreasingly larger wire?

 

[Rottmannash]

And on the other side of the restriction (or, say, in the opposite direction) would be what, a decreasingly larger wire?

So you get it, right? Almost like a double double negative.

 

[GradyBeach247]

One thing that would definitely make it fly off the shelves would be Built-in Cable Lifters -

 

[WickedInsignia]

Recommend 500 hours of burn-in and you're set! In fact, make it a mandatory requirement:
Returns valid until 14 days after purchase. Returns will not be accepted if full burn-in cycle is incomplete.

 

[mhardy6647]

Better yet send them up in SpaceX and back.

A flight with a carefully designed trajectory designed to bathe the cables-to-be with just the right amount and kind of cosmic radiation to imbue them with the perfect properties for audio signal conduction.



Meanwhile, back on earth:

https://www.parts-express.com/build...ld+Your+Next+Cable—+Custom,+Quality+&+Savings

 

[Standingstones]

Just what the audio industry needs... another cable company. Please!

 

[Loathecliff]

Try to get an Amir to endorse it, not necessarily THE Amir, just any Amir.
Endorsed by an AMIR!

A mere trifle of an endorsement that would be.............I'm sorry, I won't do it again..... often

 

[Farenheit]

I think we have finally found the perfect snake oil cable. To the great idea of the first pressing oil, it would only be necessary to add this:

https://www.parts-express.com/Rapco-Horizon-Snake-Cable-8-Channel-1-ft.-100-620

And we would already have the holy grail of cable.

Who Said Snake Oil Cable Didn't Exist?

Checkmate.

 

[holbob]

"cables rolled on the thighs of 70 year old half deaf audiophool virgins"

 

[SimpleTheater]

The jacket should be a literal garden hose. Think of the emf protection story you could tell

I decided to make the jacket clear to show the purity.

We're now ready to accept orders: http://firstruncopper.com/

Is our founders name too obvious? I wanted to make it subtle.

Now we just have to get the word out and the money should pour in.

 

[Wes]

I'm looking to cash in on the large number of enthusiasts that have lots of money and are willing to believe anything. I'm looking for investors in my company "First Run Copper" - where we only use copper run through the extrusion process the first time. We will capitalize on the idea that "First pressed olive oil is better, so why wouldn't you want extra virgin copper?"

It took me a while but I have a better idea:

"Free Run Copper"

No presses, not even a bladder press, is used for our copper. It is completely non-extruded for your pure listening pleasure.

Only the finest pure copper runs free (like the wind) when we collect the biodynamically grown copper fruits in wicker baskets. Your copper is untouched by any plastic bins, as with inferior products. Each copper fruit is then carefully placed on the sorting table for examination by our expert staff of low-paid migrant labor.

This lovely free run copper is then carefully hand-coiled and matured in an elevage of cement tanks with final finishing in pure stainless steel tanks. We then decant the cables into a hand blown glass bottle for delivery to you by a uniformed officer of the federal government.

 

[WickedInsignia]

@SimpleTheater Not sure if you're using photos of real people for the site, but to avoid any complications you could always use AI-generated ones:
This Person Does Not Exist

Could be great for the "reviewers" too!

 

[SimpleTheater]

@SimpleTheater Not sure if you're using photos of real people for the site, but to avoid any complications you could always use AI-generated ones:
This Person Does Not Exist

Could be great for the "reviewers" too!

The founder is Nikola Tesla. A real person, yes.

I will look into making those AI reviewers. Thanks a bunch.

 

[BlackTalon]

Great stuff -- I love the Guarantee terms

 

[SimpleTheater]

Free Run Copper

Crap! Non-extruded is light years better than first-run extruded.

 

[dkinric]

I decided to make the jacket clear to show the purity.

We're now ready to accept orders: http://firstruncopper.com/

Is our founders name too obvious? I wanted to make it subtle.

Now we just have to get the word out and the money should pour in.

This is brilliant. Kudos, @SimpleTheater !