I also think that the wow factor should be that nothing distrubs you on your system. If you're looking for a magic wow factor that blows you out of your seat, that does not exist. It should be that you're not feeling you miss something and can focus on the music, not your gear. Because the music is what it's about at the end and the gear is just a tool. That is what many audiophools are doing wrong and why they keep swapping and spending to much.
I understand that sentiment. I think a lot of us try to choose speakers that don't exhibit some obvious characteristic or coloration that draws attention to the speakers themselves, rather than to the music. And I totally agree about the gear being a tool to the end of enjoying music (for most of us).
On the other hand, I think there is a sense that trying to constrain any "wow" factor only to the music and not to the gear isn't strictly, or always possible or desirable.
For instance: When I listen to music on my smart speaker, my iphone, my car stereo etc none of these are high fidelity. Far from it. They are all colored to one degree or another. Yet I find myself effortlessly just listening to the music, not the "system." I'm not even thinking of the technology for the most part. That seems then like I already would have achieved the ideal of "just focusing on the music" yet with cheap, colored gear. Just like millions of other music fans.
But then, what makes us audiophiles and not *just* music lovers? It's an enthusiasm not just for music, but for sound quality, and for audio gear that will produce high sound quality.
I love sound. Since I can enjoy music on lowly gear, what I seek from my hi-fi system is a "
music PLUS" experience. That is music PLUS the added sensuality of good sound. If I'm not appreciating the added Good Sound, then I wouldn't need the hi fi system to begin with.
So for instance last night when I played an orchestral piece I not only enjoyed the music, but also the sensual quality of the richer, clearer dynamic sound, and ALSO the kick I got in acknowledging "holy sh*t I can't believe my system can produce such an experience for me."
This could be seen as somewhat of a dichotomy: the audiophile is seeking to sort of remove the sound of the gear from the chain so it's "just about the music," yet also wants to appreciate that very achievement, which is why they care about the quality of the gear in the first place. To not acknowledge the sound quality would be awfully strange.
One could perhaps try to say "Well, we can just concentrate on acknowledging the sound quality of the source." But that doesn't work: It can only be expressed by the quality of the gear. That's why people who don't have much experience with high end audio have "holy cow" moments in front of a good system. They are hearing and acknowledging the contribution of the great gear to the great sound.
So, in sum, I totally get the point you are making I believe, and it resonates with most of us I think. I'm just trying to place it in a wider context.