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A Call For Humor!
- Thread starter Tks
- Start date
Keith_W
Major Contributor
Hahaha, that reminds me of a confused elderly lady patient of mine who was going off the rails and the nurses called me to calm her down. She said "I know you men!! All of you have one thing on your minds!!!". I said "Relax, all I want is to get you into bed". The nurse burst out laughing. Oops.
And of course, two corrolaries:
Anything that you say will be taken down: "panties"
If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me.
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Funny, but my gastroenterologist of 27 years just retired. He was the finest physician I've ever encountered and God's gift to humanity, imo. I really appreciate you guys.
BinkieHuckerback
Addicted to Fun and Learning
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Two old ladies sitting on a park bench.
A streaker ran past.
One old lady had a stroke.
The other couldn't reach.
A streaker ran past.
One old lady had a stroke.
The other couldn't reach.
A Great Grandma
A car is stalled on the side of the road. A state trooper pulls in behind it, gets out and walks over to the side of the car and sees there is only an elderly woman in it who can barely see over the steering wheel.
The trooper asks the woman, “Are you OK Ma’am?"
The woman replies, “Yes, but I think my car ran out of gas.”
“OK, Ma’am, I can help you.” the trooper answers. “But I do have to ask if you have any weapons in your possession?”
“Why yes, officer, as a matter of fact I do. I have a 9mm in my purse that I carry. And I do have my concealed carry permit for it.”
Surprised the trooper then asks, “Is that all?”
The woman replies, “No, I also have a .45 automatic in the glove box.”
“Goodness Ma’am,” states the trooper, “Is there anything else you have with you?”
“Oh yes,” the woman replies, “I do keep my little .357 Magnum in the console here too.”
Rolling his eyes in disbelief, the trooper then says, “OK, is that all? Or is there another firearm in your car?”
The woman thinks for a second and then answers, “Well, just one more thing, officer. I keep a 12-gauge shotgun in the trunk.”
With an amazed look on his face, the trooper then asks, “For goodness’ sake Ma’am, what are you afraid of?”
The woman looks at him and smiles answering, “Not a damn thing!”
A car is stalled on the side of the road. A state trooper pulls in behind it, gets out and walks over to the side of the car and sees there is only an elderly woman in it who can barely see over the steering wheel.
The trooper asks the woman, “Are you OK Ma’am?"
The woman replies, “Yes, but I think my car ran out of gas.”
“OK, Ma’am, I can help you.” the trooper answers. “But I do have to ask if you have any weapons in your possession?”
“Why yes, officer, as a matter of fact I do. I have a 9mm in my purse that I carry. And I do have my concealed carry permit for it.”
Surprised the trooper then asks, “Is that all?”
The woman replies, “No, I also have a .45 automatic in the glove box.”
“Goodness Ma’am,” states the trooper, “Is there anything else you have with you?”
“Oh yes,” the woman replies, “I do keep my little .357 Magnum in the console here too.”
Rolling his eyes in disbelief, the trooper then says, “OK, is that all? Or is there another firearm in your car?”
The woman thinks for a second and then answers, “Well, just one more thing, officer. I keep a 12-gauge shotgun in the trunk.”
With an amazed look on his face, the trooper then asks, “For goodness’ sake Ma’am, what are you afraid of?”
The woman looks at him and smiles answering, “Not a damn thing!”
Waxx
Major Contributor
Waxx
Major Contributor
Waxx
Major Contributor
It would take a better man than me.
A reporter was interviewing an elderly lady on her 105th birthday.
During the interview, he asked the usual questions about how she was so healthy and vibrant during these advanced years.
Then he asked her if she was ever bed-ridden.
She said:
"Oh, many times, and once even in they hay."
During the interview, he asked the usual questions about how she was so healthy and vibrant during these advanced years.
Then he asked her if she was ever bed-ridden.
She said:
"Oh, many times, and once even in they hay."
