That's a very interesting observation.
As you point out, sound is what happens when there is no observer, but music happens in the consciousness of the listener.
It's certainly the case that perhaps most people don't like ALL genres of music, and if they think they do that can easily fall apart when confronted with novelty e.g. a westerner listening to Indian or Chinese music.
I have been struck recently when watching the BBC adaptation of "A suitable boy", one of the characters is a courtesan who sings to utterly rapt audiences. Clearly the people listening to her are transported the way that I am when I listen to Bach or Vivaldi. I feel like I can almost apprehend what they hear, but it's not accessible to me in the same way, it's extremely tantalising - wanting to find in the music that transcendental experience.
I too find I cannot easily access heavy metal and a lot of other music in recordings, the flaws are too manifest.
Consider the compelling attentional surplus that comes from plugging in some new equipment, which then leads to renewed appreciation of the music. The effect is so strong that audiophiles are willing to pay silly sums of money for things that sound exactly the same but renew their focus.
How else can that effect be achieved? (Possibly without spending so much money)
Prayer, meditation or it's poor modern relative "mindfulness" can also be employed.
Drugs or alcohol work for some people; alas they mostly just make me anxious.
Perhaps by exploring new genres, and new styles of listening? It certainly seems to be happening to me at the moment. A good scrobbler and a willing attitude is a better upgrade than a new amplifier.
Pre lockdown I often tried to mix an encounter of beauty or novelty with portable music. This can take various forms of course; from running with the right high-tempo electronic music to listening to Bach whilst walking around The National Gallery. It's why venue and audience is so important in the experience too. The music helps transcend ourselves. Metal concerts, jazz clubs, organ recitals in thousand-year-old churches, pop music surrounded by teenagers. But lockdown...
... something that I have found myself doing lately that seems to enhance the experience during lockdown; my speakers, as for most of us now I think, flank my large-screen TV and serve duty as 2-channel home theatre, and what I have taken to doing is turning off the sound on the TV and watching a visual 4K experience: one of the BBC nature programs, or youtube 4K aerial scenery of beautiful places, or even Google Chromecast set to show great artwork from the world's art galleries.
All of these things, combined with new music, help to generate a state of mind conducive to aesthetic appreciation and the addictive attentional surplus.
Doesn't mean I don't want a new pair of speakers though.