I hear all your pain!
These are mine (hand made and custom made):
View attachment 84122
It's not a final set up, of course. They came cheaper than some of those welded pipes (I don't like those).
A stand can resonate and if it does so, it's crap and it imparts on the sound same as poorly designed speaker enclosure. Something like putting your speaker on top of a piece of furniture and not decoupling it so the entire piece of furniture sings along.
When you have one that is acoustically dead, you still decouple your speaker with some extra sorbothane pads just to make sure. And there is nothing more to it.
After that it’s all about stability and safety. They are heavy to prevent knocking them over (pets or kids).
Movement is in fact real for some subs. Put them on carpet with no spikes and they can move. That’s why you use spikes for carpet and sorbothane for hardfloor.
Bookshelves will not move. You still use some pads to keep them safe from scratching when handled.
You don’t use spikes to carry the vibrations away from the speaker. It’s not like you can ground them. If your stand resonates, it doesn’t matter where the vibrations go after that – the damage is done.
So, it’s just about the inert material and desired height. Point source are good off axis in all directions so you won’t miss much if it’s not your ear’s height.
One additional benefit is pulling them away from the back wall. So, indirectly, stands will affect sound by allowing you to take speakers away from a surface.