Didn't address robustness or locking. Not every complaint is just "cavemen being afraid of change".
The lightning connector is no more less locking than the original connector. It isn't any worse than the microUSB on my phone which is a pain in the butt to attach in the dark or without line of sight.
The amount of locking depends on the purpose. Something that requires frequent plugins like a charger typically has less locking than something that is designed to stay put or there is a great consequence to it coming loose like on-stage wiring with pro-audio.
I already mentioned the locking connectors on DP that stay put on all my computers. There is no reason why you cannot have locking HDMI or use the DP connectors themselves (without the audio). The connectors and protocol are two different entities. Such a locking connector is more than enough for consumer audio stacks.
As far as your comment on resistance to change, you are right. There are many shades
Luddite: What we got is fine, don't need anything else
Jaded: I have seen my share of clunkers. Don't need to see more
Pessimistic: Look at all the problems. I don't think you can design anything better.
Sceptic: I am open to a better design but will hold my opinion until I see one
Neutral: It would be good to have X,Y, so there is a need but it would need to satisfy A,B,C, ...
Optimistic: We can do better than this and we get more this way
Pollyanna: We need the next best thing.
Take your pick.
In my line of business, neutral investors funding the optimistic entrepreneurs are the most fruitful combination. Neutrals make good engineers. Sceptics make for good QC people. The rest below them in the negative scale make for redundant middle managers.