Two audiophiles walk into a bar... (finish the joke)

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar and poke the speakers out.

 

[JohnnyAudio]

two audiophiles walk into a bar.
a beautiful woman is tending.
what’ll it be? she says absently.
the audiophiles look at each other knowingly.
two port wines, one says. something vintage, with sweet high notes.
she rolls her eyes. Yeah, I‘ll see what we got.
while she sets about it, one audiophile says to the other, I wonder if she’d be interested in a three-way.
nah, says the other. too passive.
well, she might cross over.
the bartender says, what are you two dorks talking about? I’m baffled.

This is good >>>" I’m baffled. "

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar and are arguing ... " Look, I don't want to get into a push-pull over this. "

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar for capacitor identification night, they score pretty high.

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar and A1 says.. "I keep blowing rectifiers". A2 replies " You numb skull your amps are 100 volt line voltage".

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar that they have never been to before and say... "do you free like NOS in here?"

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar, sad ole HiFi says..." there's no reason for living "

His buddy says... how about that VPI Industries Titan Turntable?

HiFi says..." got one ".

​

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar, and drink themselves flat.

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar, and yell... " shut up and put some music on! "

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar, and get arrested for impersonating an audiophile.

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar, the music and the system are so good they didn't notice it was a go-go bar.

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar, audiophile says.. "aren't you tired of my bad jokes?".
audiophile's friends says... "yeah, you sound like a broken record"

 

[killdozzer]

One says:
- You know, this live band sounds awful!
The other says:
- Yeah, without all the pops and crackle it was as if they weren't in my living room at all!
The first one goes:
- Exactly my thinking! I can't wait for the vinyl release to hear what would they naturally sound like!

 

[killdozzer]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar and are approached by Fremer and he says:
- I was never fooled by MoFi! I knew it all along!

 

[killdozzer]

...order a bottle of the strongest and say to the bartender:
Leave the bottle!

After some time, one audiophile says:
- Ah, man! Forget about her! If she never came running from the kitchen, she's just not the one.

 

[killdozzer]

one is clearly worried and says:
- The albino tiger's spunk is wearing off of my boron cantilever! I can't tell which musician is where anymore...

 

[killdozzer]

and they keep quarreling:

- No! I have a closer relationship with music and am more in touch! I only listen to vinyl!
- Argh... Here we go again! You do realize MM barely reaches 20kHz?
- Be that as it may, but i Have 3,5k dollars decouplers from I-So-Gay! It makes my silence blacker than Shaka Zulu.
- Look, newbie, I'm such a discerning aficionado of music and my TT is SOOOO resolving I can tell when Diane Krall's got a headache. And it's all thanks to my moron cantilever.
- You mean boron!?
- That's what I said.
- Anyway, headache is nothing. You can hear headache on Yamaha speakers, I'm into high end as of lately. I can hear if Nils Lofgren scored the night before.
- Ha!!! now I know you're full of shit! Audiophile musicians never score.
- No, that's just what we tell you so you wouldn't worry about all that virgin stuff.
- So... How long where you planning to leave your cable playing for burn-in?
- I got a deal with Metallica, actually, they'll use it in a concert to really give it a good seeing to.

 

[Fahzz]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar, and neither one comes close to getting lucky.

 

[JohnnyAudio]

Two audiophiles walk into a bar called The Soundbar where a big fight is in progress over if a Yamaha soundbar is better than a Sony soundbar. The Audiophiles look at each other and say... "I'm glad we're all SET".

 

[killdozzer]

And one says:

Look, don't let those FB groups get to you. You're not an audiophool. Tell you what, we'll make one of our own and ridicule science, reliable tests and data! how about that? That'll show them!