I'm reminded of the husband of a friend of my wife's, who built a sound system in the basement of their large home. We visited, and they took us on a tour. During the tour, he turned on and cranked up the sound system, interrupting an ongoing conversation between my wife and her friend, to which I had been listening (my wife's friend was far more interesting than he was, it must be admitted, despite my own interest in sound systems). As he bopped his head to the music, utterly unable to read the room and therefore missing that it was the wrong time for a demonstration, I was reminded from even further back of...
...Stanley Tibbets, the conductor of an orchestra in San Francisco in the movie
Foul Play. He keeps thinking (the incomparable) Goldie Hawn has the hots for him, in spite of all evidence, and notwithstanding that events keep pushing them into the same space at the same time.
"I've got it all!"
For the objective he had in mind, consider all the snake-oil products in view, none of which will help him attain that objective, but all of which may help him hide that fact from himself while depleting his available cash. That is, of course, the whole point of snake oil.
Rick "aside: one of the few actors who could conduct with some semblance of stick technique, but, of course, a first-class pianist" Denney