I agree that FR has an important role, even when EQed to Harman spatial effect is somewhat lessened. But take HD600 and HD800/800s and EQ both to Harman target. HD600 will be much narrower. So if the measured FR is the same, there must be something else to explain it.
In order to completely destroy HD800s spatial effect (to my ears atleast), I would need to correct it to diffuse field target.
Just to get an idea what kind of correction that is:
View attachment 417594
Among other things, that brings vocals forward and to me creates more in-head sound presentation usual of other headphones. Ofc at that point HD800s sound like sh...t.
Bottom line as I see it: FR is important, but not the only thing. If it turns out it can all be explaind with just FR, then we currently don't know/have the fine-grain tools to explain it.