You have to realize musicians don't know how they sound to you. They are up close and in touch with the instrument. They've no idea, and no reference for what it sounds like to a listener 15 feet away. They only hear it that way when they listen to other musicians. One of the most obvious is violin players. Do you think they are the authority on what a violin should sound like? They hear it under their chin and one ear very close to string and bow.
In my experience, most pro musicians (at least in the classical world) are also music teachers of some kind, either in well-established institutions or as private teachers (very few of them are successful enough not to care about added revenue, think ATP level pro tennis players). I'd say they do mostly know how things should sound like to an audience but they do focus much more on the technical side of things. They go to concerts quite often, but their primary goal is not necessarily to listen to music. They want to socialize, gossip, nail a new contract, find a new boyfriend or girlfriend
etc... None of the ones I met were audiophiles in the way we understand the term and if they accepted to listen to music after-hours, it had to be what they did not play. (ie: pianist never wanted to listen to solo piano, singer never wanted to listen to voices because it automatically put her in "work mode" etc...). If they did anyway, they would almost always focus on the playing/singing technique to criticize or admire or just listen to friends because they were friends. When listening to their own recordings, they would focus on the recording/mastering itself, spotting differences between sessions. But I guess that, like in any other professions, there's a large variation in attitude.
As far as "right or wrong" is concerned, I don't think it will be solved soon. I have different sounding systems, which implies that some of them are very "wrong" (but does not automatically imply that one of them is "right") and I enjoy all of them at different times and moods.
I sure hope no one endlessly eats the same favorite and perfectly healthy meal...