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For those of you that are around 50 YO and over - do you think about death?

EB1000

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Hi.

I know this might be a touchy subject, but in 6 weeks I will turn 49. Recently I just can't stop thinking about how little time I have left, even if I'll live to be 80.

Thirty years pass quickly. I remember 1990 as if it was yesterday. I wonder who do people who are older than me deal with the fact that life must stop at some point, which can happen very soon if you're over 60...

I even stopped adding more music to my 50k+ tracks library, because I know that I don't have much time left to listen to all my music collection and enjoy it more than once.

I've also became a health nut. I only eat low carb raw vegan food, which taste like cr@p. Luckily, I don't look anywhere near 49 (most people assume I'm 35ish). But still can't shake the thought that I'm on borrowed time.

To make things worse, I'm an agnostic atheist, so I'm unable to assure my self that I'll be going to a better place. The way I see it, when you die, you "feel" exactly the same as you felt in the 1800's...

sometimes I can't even fall asleep because I'm scared that I won't wake up in the morning (my doctor says that I have death anxiety and he proscribed me some Xanax, which I decided not to take after I read the possible side effects... :) )

How do you deal with this sad fact of life? How does it feel to be over 70, knowing you can go any day?
 

Soniclife

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Hard to get a proper read on someone from a short post on the internet, but this whole thing reads as it's time for you to embrace the science and get professional help. Stop googling stuff, do something you enjoy, like listening to music.
 

DSJR

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Approaching 50 does seem to do this to some people - it did to me I remember. Just wait until your next big one is 70 - EEK!!!

P.S. I think eventually, us oldies begin to take life day by day unconsciously and if we can, try to make the best of it.
 

Destination: Moon

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Not to make light but this reminds me of the scene in Catch 22 where Yosarian is in the mess hall and exclaims to his comrades "they're shooting at me"! Wherein they all try to explain to him they're shooting at all of us to make him feel better.... But he doesn't find that's a satisfactory answer....
Because - it isn't

It'll come for all of us. Focus on what you can effect, ignore what you can't. It's all anyone can do. Unless you think worrying away all your remaining hours is helpful or somehow enjoyable.
 

Jimbob54

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I just turned 44. There is one thing for sure, every day is a day closer to my death.

I have no desire to die, but its the impact of my death on my family I worry about, not the actual fact of death. So if I ever choose to get healthy, its for them , not me. And I will be damned if I am going to restrict myself from doing anything that I want and can do. I worry far more about disease than death itself.

Keep listening to new music (the best song ever written just might not exist yet), get enjoyment from your food, be sensible not paranoid about your lifestyle.

Death will be your final reward for living.
 

steve59

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I'm a 61 yo carpenter and my job keeps me fit, I can keep up with the kids that call me gramps. So 2 weeks ago a virus/infection resulted in a moderate amount of fluid around my heart. but what really made me aware of my mortality was a year ago when my mom was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer, terminal. While physically I feel like I can still go thru anything I ever could hearing my mom only had a year or so left me feeling mortal.
 

steve59

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I read somewhere we as humans are incapable of a selfless act. that the act itself was self serving. bummer
 

BDWoody

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It seems to me that a life without knowing there is inevitable death at the end would make it a lot less interesting.

There are no guarantees, and there is no expectation of fairness, so I just try to appreciate that I'm even here to appreciate any of it.

The hourglass runs empty for us all at some point, and staring at it constantly isn't going to change it.

I echo others, and hope that you are able to look until you find someone who can offer professional help that you are comfortable with. I am truly sorry you are struggling with this...but keep struggling until you get to the other side. Anxiety has a way of sucking the fun right out of life.

I'm 54 btw.
 

steve59

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There's the excitement of cheating death some of us personalities enjoy, but I think the bravery is rooted in taking tomorrow for granted. I think it's the privilege of the white man (b4 all this political correctness I never gave it a thought). Once we can no longer take care of ourselves or loved ones I think the reality creeps in.
 
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BDWoody

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There's the excitement of cheating death some of us personalities enjoy, but I think the bravery is rooted in taking tomorrow for granted. I think it's the privilege of the white man (b4 all this political correctness I never gave it a thought). Once we can no longer take care of ourselves or loved ones I think the reality creeps in.

This isn't the right place for that discussion. Please leave politically controversial issues outside the forum.
 
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Frank Dernie

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My Dad died at 53 I am 71 next month. When I was younger I used to expect to not live long but now it is all bonus and I never think about it. I don't take any particular health related precautions.
I am told I don't look my age, which was a bonus now but was a pain getting served in a pub when I was actually young. I eat what I feel like, I have never smoked (hated the smell as a kid and never started) and rarely drink alcohol, maybe 1 or 2 glasses of wine a month or so.

I do have to keep stopping myself considering changing my HiFi for Neumann KH 420s or Genelec 8351b and W371 or Geithian 801 K or Dutch & Dutch and... because I won't live long enough to get the value out of it - perhaps.
The only birthday I dreaded was 40. I don't remember why, just that I dreaded it.
 

Chrispy

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I've never been worried about death particularly, altho now in my 60s I know I'm closer and my body reminds me of that on a regular basis :). Have come close several times via circumstance/accidents (no particular health challenges threatening death, tho) but am still here. It could be a lot of things that take it away from you. Stressing over it does nothing, might even speed it up. I certainly don't expect anything post-death, I'll just no longer exist.
 

Snarfie

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You think to deterministic regarding dead from a quantum mechanica point of view.
 

Matias

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It is what it is, for everyone. We have to look as our glasses are half full, considering all the children or teens that died young and we got to live a long life.

Carpe diem, always.
 
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Burning Sounds

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I've just turned 71, walk the dog for a few hours everyday, and although I officially retired 6 years ago I still work a few hours everyday on a project I developed at work which helps to keep my brain agile (I think). I know I'm bored when I start taking something apart for no reason.

I've been vegetarian for more than 45 years, and vegan food doesn't have to taste bad - don't buy the processed vegan or vegetarian rubbish that the manufacturers pretend is healthy - much of it is not.

I'm well aware I could go at anytime, but I try to take everyday as it comes. I heard a skylark and a curlew for the first time this year and it did make me think about the fact that I had survived another winter. But those small things gave me a lot of pleasure.

I wish I had an answer for your concerns but I can only suggest you try and enjoy the small things and then the larger aspect of life might take care of itself.
 

Gorgonzola

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Sure, I think of death on a daily basis. I'm seventy-six if I make another week or so and I hope to. The fact is that I have health conditions that are likely to limit my life span to about only another decade more or less if I'm reasonable lucky.

That said, I'm not afraid of the idea of death and would prefer it to a long period of helplessness in at care facility.
 

Martin Takamine

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On the subject, I always say "Nobody gets out of life alive".
The good thing about our death is we don't know when or how and it could be at any moment.
Just read the news concerning people who have died, it never occurred to most when they started their day that it was their last.
Accept that death is part of the cycle of life.
Enjoy your life and don't waste time obsessing about death.
 

swampbrain

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When I was 55 (6 years ago) I had a massive heart attack. 6 way bypass followed. Then I had a defib/pacemaker implanted but that led to a blood clot being dislodged and going into my lower leg that hit 5 minutes after I was discharged from the hospital.. Emergency surgery to save my leg and life was next but while they were doing x rays they discovered I had/have 3 aneurysms in my abdomen including an aortic aneurysm that put me at high risk for a rupture and possibly a very painful death where I'd bleed out internally. Experimental surgery followed and they say I'm good to go-for now. Btw, the 6way bypass went to shit and only 2 of the grafts remained functional after 1 year. I also had a 2nd heart attack and a collapsed lung the following year. My ejection fraction is between 10-15%.

I've spent a lot of the past 5-6 years very much preoccupied with dying. Statistically speaking, I should have died within 2 years of my 1st heart attack based on the amount of damage done to it (I didn't receive treatment in time, 4 hrs or less, to stop the death of a significant amount of heart tissue) I've often felt frustrated because "things" weren't moving fast enough - and I fear/ed that I was going to run out of time. I still feel that way from time to time.

Things have gotten better tho. Like someone mentioned earlier, at a certain point you naturally (and/or by choice and effort) begin to be more present in your daily life and take your days as they come, living in the here and now, and even finding gratitude that you're still here and still have choices and opportunities to live NOW. I used to believe in some type of afterlife. I miss that comfort but realizing that this time we have here on earth may be our only shot at life.....that this may be ALL there is, has caused me to be more loving to those close to me and even kinder to those I think are assholes and idiots.

One day at a time, one foot in front of the other.
 
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