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A Call For Humor!

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At a revival meeting the preacher is promoting faith healing. “If you believe, you will be healed. All it takes is faith. Believe God will cure you and He will make you whole. Is there anyone here who wants to be healed?”

A little old lady in the front row raises her hand and he calls her on stage. She makes her way slowly on her crutches. He asks her name and she says “Mrs Smith.” He asks whether she has faith and she replies “Yes”. The preacher says “Then go behind the curtain, Mrs Smith, and you will be healed.”

He asks again if anyone else wants healing. Bily Bloggs raises his hand and says “Neth.” He too is called onstage and asked his name/ It is obvious that he has a speech defect resulting from a cleft palate when he says “Nilly Noggs.” Again the preacher asks “Do you have faith?” and receives an answer from Billy Bloggs, “Neth.” “Then go behind the curtain and you too will be healed.”

“Mrs Smith, throw out your crutch.”

A crutch is thrown over the curtain.

“Mrs Smith, throw out your right crutch.”

As the congregation whoops and hollers, with many Hallelujahs, the other crutch came over the curtain.

“Now, Billy Bloggs, have faith, speak to me.”

From behind the curtain comes Billy Bloggs' voice, “Mithith Nith juth fallen on ner arth.”
 
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I'll stop. I swear I will. For today anyhoo.
An old Jewish tailor who leads a very ordinary life. He is walking home one afternoon when he falls in love with a pair of patent leather shoes in a shop window. He rushes in, tries and buys the shoes and then wears them home. On the way, he calls out to passers-by: "Hey, mister, look at my new shoes. "Hey, lady, look at my new shoes."

He arrives home and greets his wife with a question: "What do you see what's different?" The wife looks him up and down: "What do I see what's different? The same old balding head, the same old ugly face, the same old pot belly. What's different?"

The husband goes to the bathroom, undresses and returns to his wife. He is wearing only the new shoes.

"Now, what do you see what's different?" The wife responds: "What do I see what's different? "The same old balding head, the same old ugly face, the same old pot belly, the same old limp thing hanging down."

The husband chimes in: "What do you mean 'hanging down?'. It's pointing at my new shoes!"

The wife retorts: "Next time, buy a new hat!"
 
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In my grade school I had this :)

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It seems to me, the EULA of the big players are way more nuts :)
Correct. One example, stolen from the internets:
Amazon Lumberyard is a free game engine. Anyone can use it to build or host a game; it integrates with Twitch streaming and Amazon's AWS cloud platform.
In section 57.10 of the AWS EULA, Amazon states that you should not use Lumberyard with critical systems like medical devices or nuclear facilities. But it makes one exception to this:


However, this restriction will not apply in the event of the occurrence (certified by the United States Centers for Disease Control or successor body) of a widespread viral infection transmitted via bites or contact with bodily fluids that causes human corpses to reanimate and seek to consume living human flesh, blood, brain or nerve tissue and is likely to result in the fall of organized civilization.
So if the zombie apocalypse ever happens, it's good to know that you won't face any legal repercussions for running your X-ray service on Amazon Lumberyard.
 
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True innovation often isn't pretty.
:cool:

Oh...
meanwhile, this just in from the fertile memefields at hifihaven.org
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I figure such a configuration is either intended for a Second Law of Thermodynamics workaround... or...
a violation of worldwide electrical codes (e.g., for the installation of a generator or photovoltaic system) so extreme that the death penalty could be invoked in response to a conviction.
:cool::facepalm:
 
View attachment 473957
True innovation often isn't pretty.
:cool:

Oh...
meanwhile, this just in from the fertile memefields at hifihaven.org
View attachment 473955

I figure such a configuration is either intended for a Second Law of Thermodynamics workaround... or...
a violation of worldwide electrical codes (e.g., for the installation of a generator or photovoltaic system) so extreme that the death penalty could be invoked in response to a conviction.
:cool::facepalm:
Won't want to discuss what fits into another ...
 
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