A Call For Humor!

[Waxx]

Most people think that BMW stands for "Bayrische Motorenwerke" when in fact it's " bring  mich  Werkstatt" (take me to the workshop).

Ah, in West-Flanders (coastal Belgium) it stoot for "Bucht Mé Wieln" (crap with wheels), but today it seems to be a lot better than before. I drive one now for about 1.5 years and had not had a single technical issue but a flat tire...

 

[Keith_W]

Most people think that BMW stands for "Bayrische Motorenwerke" when in fact it's " bring  mich  Werkstatt" (take me to the workshop).

Broke My Wallet
Brutal Money Waster
Bitch, Moan, and Whine

and another one ... Frighteningly Expensive Repairs Required At Regular Intervals.

 

[Martin]

 Failure On  Recent  Dataset

View attachment 447623

Reminded me of this old joke:

At a recent computer exposition, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: “If General Motors had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.”

In response to Bill’s comments, GM issued a press release stating: “If General Motors had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason, you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive – but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single “General Protection Fault” warning light.
7. The airbag system would ask “Are you sure?” before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time GM introduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10. You’d have to press the “Start” button to turn the engine off.

Martin

 

[Ken1951]

For Ford fans it's:
First On Race Day!

 

[sergeauckland]

Reminded me of this old joke:

At a recent computer exposition, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: “If General Motors had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.”

In response to Bill’s comments, GM issued a press release stating: “If General Motors had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. You’d have to press the “Start” button to turn the engine off.

Martin

That's what my car has...

S.

 

[Shiva]

Ford,
Fire on Race Day
Found on road dead...

 

[KellenVancouver]

 

[Gary_G]

Break Out Another Thousand

 

[snakedctr]

 

[KellenVancouver]

 

[ta240]

 

[Timcognito]

 

[Audionaut]

View attachment 447649

You only need one of these cards

Not this one

 

[ta240]

 

[ta240]

 

[thewas]

 

[Platypus20]

Fiat- failure in automotive technology

 

[SoonToBeRetired]

Fiat- failure in automotive technology

it used to be "Fix It Again, Tony".

 

[mhardy6647]

Fiat- failure in automotive technology

What the world needs now is a witty acronym for Stellantis.

 

[RayDunzl]

Parrot and Guitar Duet